This very un-Presidential campaign by a bombastic charlatan has me grateful my parents are not around to witness how far this process has declined in the years since they died. They would not understand what’s been happening. They would disdain the misogyny and the racism of the right, and while they would never condone the extreme judgmentalism on the left, neither of them would consider voting for the nasty, exclusionist, decidedly unChristian Republican agenda. They’d be the first to line up in their districts to vote for Kamala Harris.

I am sure of this. Because in the end, we have become a nation divided by a lack of commitment to the Republic’s ideals, by our society’s inability to embrace a reasonable concept of ethics, justice, community, and morality. Allegiance to a shouting puppet have robbed too many of any clear sense of right and wrong.

My parents would have no problem defining where to draw the line.

In my parents’ home, politics, like religion, was a matter of personal choice. My mother was Jewish; Dad was Protestant. They never argued that one or the other was right or wrong; they made sure we understood the commonalities in their traditions, and they expected us to be honorable people, whichever faith we chose to accept or reject. The same was true of politics.

Dad was a proud, adamant Iowa Republican. Mom, once a Jabotinsky devotee who had to emigrate from Europe to the US, was a staunch, unwavering Democrat. She was a socialist; he was not. During the weeks leading up to the Adlai Stevenson/Dwight Eisenhower race, I remember heated arguments.

But neither ever called the other names or went to bed angry, and each kept their actual vote to themselves. In 1960, I was smitten with JFK, whom Dad clearly disliked. But he never impeded the efforts my mother and I made campaigning door to door, handing out flyers and buttons. Nor did Mom, who detested Nixon, insist that he change his politics to suit hers.

Overall, they shared the same values. Dad insisted he had no socialist leanings, but it was he who brought the homeless to our house for a hearty meal and a night or two of real rest in a comfortable bed. It was Mom who insisted we go to Church with Dad on Sundays. Both believed that human kindness was the hallmark of good citizenship, and they wanted their children to know enough about both religion and politics to make informed choices in every community arena.

My parents’ belief in America, their faith in Democracy, was based on core values. It was easy for them to make the necessary adjustments. If a candidate was in any way antithetical to what mattered to them, they would vote conscience over Party.

In 1976, I was amused to see Dad entirely uninvested in the Presidential race. He was not a fan of Gerald Ford, but he did not know enough about Jimmy Carter to vote Democratic. I am pretty sure he sat that one out. Then, in 1980, as he observed the last campaign he’d be alive for, he was visibly, audibly, openly disgusted by Ronald Reagan. That time he voted for Jimmy Carter, and when Carter lost, Dad swore he’d never vote again. I suspect he would have been ambivalent about Walter Mondale, but he would have been despondent to learn that Reagan had won again.

America needs my parents’ attitude this week. We need liberated men and women to stand up against the authoritarian ideals of this new Republican Party. We need informed voices like those members of the Lincoln Project to be as brave as my father was in 1980. We need people who will stand by rectitude and righteousness, people who can reject the cultish insistence on following their leader, people to go to the polls and vote their conscience rather than their party.

My closest friend, a person I have always known as a Republican, with whom I have had a life-long agreement to disagree, texted me last week to say, “I voted for Kamala today. I do not recall ever voting for a Dem.” I told him I thought it was a huge concession. He replied, “Not huge. I would never vote for a Hitler wanna-be.”

His subsequent text moved me to tears. “I have my hopes that the women of America are the hidden sucker punch,” he wrote. “I want them walking softly carrying the big vote.”

Amen.